The Obelisk Questionnaire: Dee Calhoun
Posted in Questionnaire on February 26th, 2021 by JJ KoczanThe Obelisk Questionnaire is a series of open questions intended to give the answerer an opportunity to explore these ideas and stories from their life as deeply as they choose. Answers can be short or long, and that reveals something in itself, but the most important factor is honesty.
Based on the Proust Questionnaire, the goal over time is to show a diverse range of perspectives as those who take part bring their own points of view to answering the same questions. To see all The Obelisk Questionnaire posts, click here.
Thank you for reading and thanks to all who participate.
The Obelisk Questionnaire: Dee Calhoun of Spiral Grave, Iron Man, author, and solo performer
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Basically, I’m just a fan who gets to do and create things that I’m a fan of. It all started with music and has branched out from there. My mother would hear me singing along to stuff like Kiss and Sabbath in my bedroom when I was a pre-teen, and guilted/bribed me into entering a talent show at school. I ended up winning, and that set everything in motion. For decades it was only music, but in the past several years that has branched out into writing and voice work as well. It all goes back to mom putting a boot in my ass and telling me not to be afraid to try things.
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Probably my brother-in-law, who is 20 years older than me, playing me stuff like Grand Funk and Alice Cooper when I was in grade school. The big one was seeing Kiss on TV in 1976. That was the moment when I said “I want to do that.”
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As a fan, seeing Kiss on the reunion tour in 1996. I never saw Kiss in makeup on the first run, so seeing the band that really started it all for me, in full glory, was amazing for me. We had front row center for that show, and when the house lights went out my friend and I were hugging one another cheek to cheek, jumping up and down and crying. It was a moment of pure joy, and moments like that are few and far between.
As a performer, it was when my son joined me onstage at the second Maryland Doomfest. I’ve played bigger sets than that, both solo and in bands, but that’s a moment that I’ll take to my grave with me.
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I was raised in a Pentecostal church, and was taught that things regarding The Lord were not to be questioned. It was my getting into music that made me take a long hard look at some things, and made me realize that things should be questioned. About once a year we’d have the standard “Rock and Roll is the Devil’s Music” sermon, and I would always be sure to be right in front to watch and listen. We’d hear about everything from backward message to what certain band’s names stood for, and I could always look forward to an argument with my parents when I got home. Finally, they realized that I was into this music, and that I was a polite, well-spoken kid (teenager by then) who got good grades, didn’t drink or dope, and wasn’t holding séances. It was a learning experience for all of us.
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It takes us inward, as we search our own souls for the music to record, or for the words to be written on paper. It extends us outward, and we share these things with our audience. It can serve as a coping mechanism, or as a way to celebrate. It can be the conduit to pull something beautiful out of something horrific.
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Being content and happy. I’ve known musicians who were on tour and “living the dream” who were miserable. I’ve also known people whose only musical outlet was playing songs to their kids at bedtime and who were thrilled about it. That’s the name of the game.
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My three-year-old daughter dead on a hospital table. I picked her up and held her. It was the worst moment of my life, but you know what? I’m still here.
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I would love to direct a film. I do all of my own video work, and I’ve been involved in some documentary films, and I think creating a film from the ground up would be a wonderful experience.
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Release, and the satisfaction of creating something. Even if no one hears it, reads it, or sees it, just the act of making the art is a wonderful thing for the soul. If that art can impact someone else in a positive way, then even better.
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The release of my first novel. After that, being able to hang out with friends again.
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