How I Will Should Have Spent My Saturday Night
Were I a better reviewer-type person, I’d drudge my ass out tomorrow night to go see Dead Man at the Cake Shop in Manhattan. So far as I know it’s the first US trip for the Swedish psych-folkies, and who knows if there will ever be another? They put out that Euphoria record through MeteorCity last year, and that was pretty cool. Not landmark or anything, but alright. I’d be happy to watch those guys dork it up for an hour or so.
Why not go? Because the Cake Shop, a venue located in the basement of — wait for it — a cake shop, is ground zero for hipster douchebaggery. And I’m not just talking Buddy Holly glasses and tight pants. I mean the worst of the worst; people who don’t grow ironic moustaches because they think that not growing them is even more ironic than growing them! People posing as impoverished because they think the poor are “so authentic” while their parents out on Long Island pay their $1,500 monthly Williamsburg rent! Graphic designers!
Dead Man are slated to go on at 11:00PM, which means they probably won’t take the stage until well after midnight, because only assholes do things on time and since we’re all post-grads with shitty beards it’s not like we actually have anywhere to be in the morning, right? I just don’t have it in me to stand there, most likely by myself, holding an eight dollar beer and wondering when all these American Apparel pseudo-bohemians are going to go back for their M.B.A. and leave their fashion fascism behind for the comfort of the whitebread suburbs from whence they came. I’m sorry. I know I’ll really wish I went — in fact, what I really wish was that I had gone when they played Philly (which is like New York except the people are actually people and not cardboard advertisements for people) on Feb. 6. I was a fool.
So, I’m sorry. I know if you’re out there reading this, you’re going to be heartbroken at the lack of a Dead Man live review, but I just can’t do it. If Dead Man wants to come play in the pastoral Rockaway River Valley — a setting far better fitting their sound — they’re more than welcome anytime. I can’t promise anyone but me and the sleepy dog will be there, but that’s got to be better than playing for the kinds of assholes that are going to show up at the Cake Shop tomorrow night.
Tags: Dead Man, MeteorCity, Sweden
JJ, do you regret not gong to see them in hindsight? :)
Maybe the reason, since I come across like an asshole here. But you can’t see everybody and this band was cool but I haven’t thought about them in years. I went to the Cake Shop for Truckfighters the next year and I think my band played our last show there Dec. 2010, but yeah. I probably should’ve gone to this show, but moreover I shouldn’t have been a dick about not.
I didn’t think it came across like that, I was just wondering as I love those Dead Man records and know they’re not around anymore