I guess I don't understand how dictating what team you'll re-sign with if traded is wrong? All the Hornets have to do is honor the contract they signed with Paul, then renegotiate it when it's over to keep him. It's NO's choice to trade him. Now if Paul declares he'll holdout unless traded, that's another situation. But a player chooses where they want to play in free agency, so re-signing choices don't seem any different to me.
My main gripe is with the system.
Guys like CP3, 'Melo, Howard all know exactly what they are going to get once they hit the market. Whether they sign with NY, Milwaukee, Chicago, or whomever they know what their next contract will look like. This gives them all the power and completely screws their teams over, as they lose a lot of leverage. While in other sports teams are forced to trade a player due to their not being able to resign them, they do so with a larger market. Jose Reyes would never demand a trade to Team A because he has no idea what his market will be. He might want to sign with Team A but he has no idea if Team B will come calling with a better offer. As a result, more teams can be in on the Reyes sweepstakes.
I don't know how to fix the system other than doing away with the cap, which won't happen, so I don't know if theirs a way to fix this. And, to be fair, no team has had to give away their guy in any lopsided deal yet. I guess my fear is largely in the potential of such a scenario though where a team gets backed into such a corner that they have to trade player X for pennies on the dollar.